they’re good at. These realisations boost their resilience and ability to take on greater challenges.

Your ability to take appropriate, effective action is affected by various things in your life that may seem to have a little direct relation to the task at hand. Your values are a good example of this. Your self-confidence is likely to waver if you don’t value what you excel at doing. Research shows that if you value what you’re good at, you’re likely to be highly confident in that area. If you value what you’re not so good at, then you will not feel so confident, even though your friends may reassure you that this is not much of a problem at all.

Building confidence begins with going with your strengths. If you’re great at music, don’t beat yourself up because you’re not going to play international rugby. Pat yourself on the back, practise accepting- ing compliments for everything you do well and enjoy the positive reinforcement from others. Respect and honour yourself, and you’ll find that you get respect and honour from those around you.

For confidence to thrive and grow, you must concentrate your attention on what you’re good at, rather than trying to turn your- self into something that you’re not.